Fill me up, Lord

"You will seek me, & find me when you seek me w/ all your heart," God says. But that is not the whole story. I'm not just a searcher. I'm also a hider. You too. We have to come face-to-face w/ our tendency to hide, to get lost. ~John Ortberg, Love Beyond Reason

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

Forgiving Thomas

My "nephew" is really my cousin Cath's son. *YOU HAVE A SON CATH!!!! HOW WEIRD IS THAT??? Wasn't it just yesterday we played "annie" with Robin and stalked Vincent?

He is due July 19th or the 20th. I can't remember.
Update: She said kind of both. Hopefully she will add a comment so we virgins can understand this.
UPDATE 2: Cath says, "due date I have is July 20th. But, I've always turned to the next week (39 weeks, 40 weeks, etc) on Wednesdays, which is tomorrow the 19th. So I guess its the 20th, but I don't know why. 40 weeks and 1 day? Anyway, normal human gestation is anywhere from 37-42 weeks. They give you a "due date" in the middle of 40 weeks, just as an average. but it doesn't mean anything."

Well Cath, at least you are not an elephant. Doesn't it have a gestation period of a year or something?

Anyway, his mother (my sister-cousin)aka Catherine Cousin Carlson McNiel (check out her blog-see column to the right) said that his middle name will be "THOMAS" after his father and grandfather's middle name. It's kind of a tradition on her side as well, as her brother has his father's first name.

Well anyway, I am dying to know his first name. And she is keeping it a secret, and like I totally respect that, but the suspense is killing me. I mean she won't even give me the first letter or even the LAST letter in his first name. So right now his name is Blank Thomas McNiel, and isn't that a little sad? The poor aunt needs to know her nephew's name! Especially since I told the mother, that she was going to have to share him with me. I shared MY stuff with her.... like popsicles, books, Odyssey tapes, a MINI-VAN... Now granted, she does have to do the laboring, etc., but I would be more than willing to split the labor pains with her. I'm not even kidding. I really would. I just hope she pops it out soon, so BLANK gets a name!!!
Last week a mentor in my life said that I needed to forgive this anonymous person I keep mentioning. I knew that... but her saying it gave me extra motivation. Up until that point, I wasn't trying to forgive her, just praying for good blessings to fall upon her.

It's really not going very well.

Okay, yesterday in small group I continued to ask for prayer about my anger/forgiveness issue.

I went to bed last night, intending to read verses on overcoming food-related strongholds, from a book titled "PRAYING GOD'S WORD" by Beth Moore. (I am a Beth Moore groupie.) It is the sequel/prayer book to a study I did awhile ago titled Breaking Free from Spiritual Strongholds. Anyway, I open my book to a section on "FORGIVENESS"! (now I am always skeptical when people say they will open the Bible randomly and say that a particular verse spoke to them, but this is the real thing, I promise.)

The chapter was actually really good. It had some great narrative advice and broke the process of forgiveness down. It had scriptures that you could personally apply to each situation/person. I am looking forward (sorta) to working through this chapter. Because like so many people have said, holding bitterness in your heart is just hurting yourself, & can cause you to be spiritually/physically sick. Plus, it's sin! Isn't that enough???

My FINAL (well, He probably has more coming...) sign from God was that a woman who I don't really know, but for some reason, she forwarded me this devotional on FORGIVENESS!!! HELLO GOD.... I GET IT!!! But I really thank You for the reminders and for your patient love.


  • At 6:02 PM, July 18, 2006, Blogger Catherine said…

    Hi Cousin-sister! Just to assure you, we haven't actually 100% settled on the name, which is why we aren't saying anything. We need to keep our options open. And believe me -- *I* hope he comes soon too!!!!!

    Catherine Cousin Carlson McNiel

  • At 6:32 PM, July 18, 2006, Blogger nyukers said…

    I'm glad you're sooo excited about baby blank coming--I think Thomas is a great middle name--one I hope to use someday as well!!! I stopped by and left Cathy a comment--hope she doesn't mind.

    Is this in some way breaking your heart??? I just had to ask because each and every time I become an aunty it breaks my heart to some extent.

    glad you are working on the forgiveness thing.

    I am updating both of my blogs today--so stop by!


Post a Comment

<< Home